Recently, we had the opportunity to see just how news was reported in the late 80s – Impact’s formative years. We found Conservative society members tearing down anti-apartheid posters, rent strikes by infuriated campus-dwellers, a series of food fights plaguing the formal meals in Sherwood hall and an ill fated campus 14 which made it only as far as Nightingale before the police were called. Here are a few snapshots.

“This raises important questions about student-staff relations”

Not quite the words I would have used if I was the accomplished trumpet player who had just seen three of his own teeth knocked out by a member of the kitchen staff in a fight at Sherwood Hall. The young man never played the trumpet again, but with this kind of restraint he must have been perfectly qualified for a career in the diplomatic service.

“Mark said it was not his function within the Union to pass round coffee.”

Impact revealed these secret Executive minutes in Issue 6, and the results were truly shocking. It was found that Exec member ‘Mark’ would not deign to distribute the hot beverages, while another member was forced to apologise for his woeful aftershave. A tea bag was eventually found, as the purchase of Nescafe had been deemed too expensive by the committee.

“I rue the day that I ever gave him the minibus keys.”

The words of Union Vice-President Sarah Morris, after President-elect Joe Harker scraped the Trent Building while driving the minibus from the crèche to the Sports Hall. The building wasn’t as damaged as the popular Harker’s dignity, as he gave the following reason for the debacle:
“The building suddenly moved to the left and I could do nothing to avoid it.”

“Can you come again in three months?”

Future Editor Martin Stott, having waited for hours in an office at Nottingham Forest, is given much longer to prepare for his Brian Clough interview than he expected.
“If things had gone on any longer, Council might have started to discuss things relevant to Nottingham students.”

Cynical columnist Vince Vesuvius’ principal concern was not the fact that an SU Council meeting had continued on until two o’clock in the morning, but that the bar had been closed for about three and a half hours previous. Things had reached the point, he claimed, that some members of the council were beginning to look sober, and others were actually starting to look like they understood what was being discussed. “This will not do!” he declared.

“The repair man found entangled in the works some twenty pairs of womens’ underwear.”

Campus gossip-supremo ‘Sir Hugh Boot’ discovers the cause of a tumble-dryer failure in Cavendish hall. Impact News: at the forefront of investigative journalism since 1985.

Dave Jackson and Justine Moat

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