Nights
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Cafe Of The Month
The Alley Café
The Alley Café is a warm little space hidden away in a courtyard just off Market Square. Don’t be put off by the fact that it is 100% vegetarian, vegan and organic. It manages to provide food that is imaginative as well as delicious. Equally good for a greasy breakfast or a healthy lunch, the menu won’t scare away committed carnivores. Fresh fruit juices in the day become fresh fruit cocktails at night. The Alley Cat is a particular favourite. From Wednesday to Saturday it opens late and there are always DJs playing a wide range of music from around the world. Local art is all over the walls, demonstrating the café’s dedication to locally-sourced produce. The cozy atmosphere and the friendly staff give Alley Café its appeal, the only problem is finding a seat!
Alice Crook
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Restaurant Of The Month
4550 Miles From Delhi
Despite being located on the same road as three other top Nottingham Indian restaurants, 4550 is still doing a roaring trade - a testimonial to the establishment’s warranted popularity. With such an extensive menu one would think that the quality of the food would suffer, but from my experience everything I inhaled in that restaurant was very good. I would say however that the 60 or so main dishes make ordering rather troublesome. A good idea, especially if you’re hungry, is to go for the banquet. At £20 a head it isn’t cheap but you get to sample a wide range from the menu and all the accessories are included (naan, rice, poppadoms etc). I recommend to those a little short on cash to stick to the vegetarian options which are about three or four pounds cheaper than their meat counterparts and every bit as delicious…and maybe skip dessert.
Sara Ferrity
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Not So Much Bingo Wing As Bingo WIN
If you want to beat the credit crunch, get yourself down to Gala Bingo on Radford Boulevard. Because everybody knows the best way to make yourself wealthier is to gamble what little you already have.
After promising my mate a free drink for accompanying me to Gala Bingo, we both entered wholeheartedly into the spirit of things. Being bingo virgins, we were confused by the lingo: books, the dobber (that thing you stamp the numbers out with, and no you cannot just use a pen) and other such bingo paraphernalia that we were coerced into shelling out for. Out of pure confusion we bought a ‘superbook’ for £7 and took our seats in the hall.We were going to go the whole hog and have a meal from the diner, but decided to take the bingo experience one step at a time and leave the artery failure for next week. Bingo wings are really not a myth at Gala.
It transpired that bingo is much harder than it looks. To quote Carol Vordeman, it appeared that the numbers really didn’t add up. We didn’t realise that the numbers ascend in tens line by line, so took us a good few games to stare bewildered at the page, staring myopically at the big screen wondering how people win money from this.
The game is addictive: despite looking like several cards short of a pack, we sat in exalted silence for much of the two hours, excitedly arranging our bingo date next week. The highlight came when my friend got a ‘full house’ and won £100; unfortunately, we shook hands before we started to split whatever we won, so I pocketed £50. All is fair in love and gambling though?
We ended the evening at the respectable time of 9.30pm with a profit of £43 quid in pound coins jangling in my bag. Kids, there really is such a thing as a free lunch.
Cathy Adams
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Restaurants To Take Your Parents To
So your parents are coming to visit and want to take you out for a meal. You spy the ideal opportunity to take advantage of the fact that they haven’t seen their darling child for quite some time and will want to treat you a little. Fed up with microwave meals and often inedible hall dinners, you’re looking forward to finally eating food which is appetising (and even more importantly, which you won’t have to pay for!) But where to take them? Well look no further, because we’ve found some fantastic places. So read below and then go eat to your heart’s content!
Fashion @ 10, Middle Pavement
The Lace Market is full of great places to eat and Fashion is one of those. Situated between the entrance of the Broadmarsh centre and the Jazz Cafe, Fashion is a very inviting and sophisticated place to take your parents whilst showing them the more attractive parts of Nottingham. The layout and decoration of the restaurant, including a long cocktail bar, is stylish and modern. Fashion’s menu caters for even the fussiest person by providing a ‘light lunch’ menu as well as a wide range of pasta dishes and typically English main courses like fish and chips and bangers and mash, which are fairly priced between £10 and £18. Mums and daughters will love the choice of over 40 cocktails, while fathers and sons will enjoy the selection of over 12 different beers. All in all Fashion offers friendly and attentive service, which helps make it a great place to enjoy a catch up with your family.
Strada @ The Cornerhouse
Situated in the centre of town in the Cornerhouse (round the corner from Wagamamas), Strada is an ideal place to take your parents when they come to visit. The layout and setting is modern and contemporary and provides a relaxing atmosphere for a catch up with the family. Strada also offers two lunches for the price of one for students during the week which represents great value for money. The menu itself has an authentic Italian structure (i.e. antipasti, starter, main and dessert) and is affordable with an average main course costing around £12-£13. Personally I would recommend the pizzas, which were big and reasonably priced at around £9. There is also a large and varied wine list for your parents to choose from, which accompanied with friendly and pleasant service, makes Strada well worth a visit.Seb Walke & Ed Davidson
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The Bar Fact File
Ever got ready for a night out with your mates only to realise that you don’t actually know which clubs or bars you’re going to? Well here’s a quick guide to some of the many bars in Nottingham and what they have to offer:
Cucumara: Nottingham’s own chic cocktail bar has a buzzing atmosphere and a unique range of cocktails to suit everyone’s taste. Whether you’re heading for pre-club drinks or simply fancy a night away from the clubs, vibrant Cucumara is sure to get you in the party mood.
Yates’s: Strictly not a bar, there is much more going on at Yates’s than meets the eye. Yates’s has something different on each night of the week. From the Cocktail Club on Mondays to Live Music Wednesdays there is something for everyone here.
The Approach: A comfortable yet modern pub, The Approach’s chilled out vibe is just right for sitting and chatting with your friends. With student friendly prices and live music, The Approach offers just the right blend of nonchalance and style to start or end your night in town.
Lloyds No.1 Bar: Situated next to the glamorous and exotic Coco Lounge, Lloyds No.1 Bar seems to fade into the background. In all honesty the bar/pub is not much more than an average bar, with the redeeming feature of having quite cheap prices and Oceana around the corner!
Archana Mani
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Out With The Old, In With The New?
Fancy trying something different for a night out? Impact has a few ideas.
The Hawksley
Blissfully bored of the Bag? Not hip, hop or happening in The Happy? If you fancy a change from the usual late-night Lenton habitats, make your way up to Canning Circus and check out The Hawksley. This newly renovated pub mixes the traditional and the modern on two levels as it serves a range of local, hearty ales and classic pub grub in a contemporary setting. The lower level consists of the bar, table football and games machines, a variety of comfy seating areas and towards the rear there are the caves for those of you wanting to enjoy your drink in a cosy and secluded area.
Upstairs you’ll find more space to relax, including a covered terrace garden with outdoor heating, an advantage for those of you who are fed up of having to leave your drink and light up outside the front entrance. The Hawksley also houses three widescreen plasma televisions showcasing all the biggest football, rugby and cricket games throughout the year so for all you sports fans you can watch your favourite teams in comfort and style.
With food and drink to match and beat the prices of the neighbouring Ropewalk, you should definitely make sure you pay a visit to The Hawksley.Hanna Flint
RED @ Escucha
On hearing that Impact was searching for somebody to review Thursday night at Escucha, I was only too happy to oblige - well I do live directly opposite after all, which technically makes it my local. Having previously visited Escucha one Saturday evening I had been left feeling unimpressed and decided it was only fair to give it a second chance. Whilst eternal optimism reigned supreme, it was certainly not rewarded; my repeat visit did nothing to appease my initial feelings of distaste, but rather served to cement my opinion of Escucha as a tacky, seedy bar masquerading as a high-class establishment. It was certainly high class, it was indeed top shelf; the flyer for the night should read ‘vibe: under 18s rave’, ‘dress code: pimps and hos’, ‘behaviour code: inexistent but Michael Jackson/Usher impersonators very well received.’ On arrival we were greeted by polite, friendly doormen, however, subsequently served by a rather obnoxious barman who, on my previous visit, had ever so kindly informed me that he would not make a non-alcoholic cocktail for me as “it wasn’t worth the effort”. Now that’s what I call a perfect model of customer service! What followed was a downward spiral into the grimy depths of Escucha shortly after witching hour. And whilst I must admit that I very much enjoyed the DJ’s selection of R ‘n’ B, peppered with Garage classics, such a playlist did nothing to dissipate the burgeoning posse accumulating centre stage in order to display their moves before their not-so discerning audience - all 20 of us.
Rachel Russell
Full Moon Party
Let’s face it, this vomit-stained dance hall scenario is not the expansive stretch of beach one would associate with the legendary Full Moon parties in Ko Phan Yang, however there is a distinct possibility you will find yourself surrounded by messy students. Seemingly the premise behind this night is to cash in on the student market that spends their summer in Thailand, but the reality is that anyone who has partied the night away throwing shapes in a Thai jungle clearing, supping a bucket of Sangsom Whisky, would not be caught dead in this stain on Nottingham’s alternative night selection.
In order to maintain this moronic fallacy that Ocean is somehow on a par with the moonlight-soaked, Red Bull-fuelled, sordid rave of wickedness that is a real Full Moon party, the mainstream cheese has thankfully conceded to a popular selection of Dance and Drum & Bass. Rather than acting as a novelty that would compliment the club night, the fancy dress is more useful as a twat indicator, pointing out the massively ignorant from the generally unaware – the smiles on their beautiful young faces also tell me they will never know any better. If YOU are one of those people, I’m sorry to cause a fuss, but this hideous dance floor foreplay is not a rave, and will never encapsulate the spirit of Drum & Bass or Breaks communities in Thailand – stop kidding yourself.Johnny Oceanless
Pub Golf
On Thursday October 9th 2000 Nottingham university students teed off on one of the biggest events of the first term. The widely renowned university sport of Pub golf, which entails each bar representing a hole on a golf course, and each drink in these bars having a par - which relates to the amount of attempts you take to complete the ‘hole’- was played by these 2000 students, all at the same time. The result was a carnival atmosphere in the centre of Nottingham, with all of the participants sporting the glowing white t-shirts of Pub Golf Uk. Not only did participants get to enjoy a host of deals in the bars involved, they were also enabled entry into the student-only nightspot that is Ocean, for a huge after party. Pub Golf Uk itself is greatly representative of the student community of Nottingham, as it is run by students, for students. This newly established company has its ambitions set upon engaging most of the country in this unique and fun bar crawl invention, so other university towns should don their visors and pull up their diamond socks, as judging by the resounding success Pub Golf Uk has had in Nottingham, it is an institution that is here to stay.
Chloe Leighton
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Vent Your Spleen
I can’t even begin to describe how much I hate the word “LOL.” No, hang on a minute, an inability to find these words would be hypocritical. It is precisely this contemporary lack of ability to express oneself accurately that I detest so much. Therefore, for the good of the English language, I persist…
“LOL.” I hate, just hate it. That long, mundane, deadening sound that shrivels up any ounce of genuine laughter you would have been about to exert, out loud, if the phrase had not just been uttered. It’s so insulting to be met with a “LOL.” That response is just so blasé, so nonchalant, so fake. And so lazy! With only one extra letter you could have yourself a “haha.” Or a “hehe” even, spice things up a little! Say it out loud – “Ha.Ha.” Go on. With feeling. Doesn’t it conjure up the sound of genuine laughter? Doesn’t it express what you really mean? Your true emotions? Now repeat “LOL.” Does that conjure up happy memories for you? No, because the only authentic word it comes close to is ‘lull,’ a dull-sounding word standing for calm, stillness and silence. It couldn’t be any more opposed to the genuine sound of laughter. Why have people resorted to this monstrosity? To save themselves from typing just one more letter? You would have to be a very happy person indeed, sharing said happiness in a considerable number of texts and emails, to save yourself any significant amount of time by typing just one less letter here. It’s hardly the same as reducing, say, the Women’s International League for Peace and Freedom to WILPF, is it? Guys, I know it requires a little bit more effort, the “H” and the “A” keys are much further away from each other on the keyboard than the “L” and the “O,” but people, we’re living in a time of a mounting obesity crisis as it is - we need all the exercise we can get! Go on, have a work out, express your true emotions, give a “hehe” a go today.
Kathryn Furness
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Overheard In Hallward
I know it’s a common phrase, but it just sounds wrong
All they do is explode Like over my shoulder or something
My mum gets off at 9 Why won’t you take me to the hindu temple?
He’s learning Arabic in French She used chill as an adjective
Such a hash brown
Of course we recovered the shoe
But the gadgets they chose were ridiculous
More boring than a real poker game
I just don’t understand why they have a dead guy on the front
Are you just going on the fact that his face offends you?
Because it’s within my nature to be a loser, that’s why
You gotta laugh or just cry
Come Patsy
Just put your hat on and shut up
Humous Party
You’re cool
The brilliance of the blue jumper never fails
For people who are oversize
I’m vitamined-up for 4 hours now
He’s going to need at least 10 years’ experience before he comes anywhere near me with that needle
Eww I think something dropped off it
With my shoes on, with some guy being sick on me
You’re a joker mate, therefore you can’t wear those
How can anything be kept secret in Hallward?
Err don’t stack Are you sure you’re using this chair?
I’m going to get some scissors, I can’t do it with my teeth
You’d think the music industry was shallow enough not to let someone like her slip through the cracks
Not sure if it’s food, warmth, love or a healthy mixture of all three
Burn!
Oh my god I used to fancy you back!
It’s the only reality tv programme I’d even consider going on
All I remember is
‘And prively he caughte hire by the queynte’Oli Holden-Rea
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Our Man In Ningbo
A whim on the E-Bikes took us to Club Shang Shang. As soon as we reached the bouncy dancefloor we gained a Chinese patron that constantly handed us fresh beers. He also made us dance with his girls, one of which he seemed involved with. I instinctively distrusted him but respectfully drank all alcohol that came my way. Er Dong, as he later introduced himself as, then drove us to a fish restaurant for food. Introducing us to his friend, the boss of the place, we noticed they had similar thick gold necklaces. He would not explain in detail what this was but later told us that it cost 70, 000 Kuai (7000 quid).
A few weeks later we were invited to his home. Far from Ningbo, somewhere in the countryside, he took us to a large complex to meet his wife, son and aunt. In a living room surrounded by glossy family portraits he sat us down and played his wedding video, which also included shots of the same pictures. Next was dinner with his mum. He never allows us to pay. Instead, a man, again with the gold necklace, produces a man bag filled with wads of cash. A diversion on the way to KTV (karaoke) took us to get our hair washed, of all things, complete with head massage and chewing gum. We were apparently supposed to be well groomed for the next activity.
This was not the KTV we had been accustomed to; lines of women with small suitcases lined the long, elegant and dimly-lit corridors, bowing to greet us as we passed. As we settled into our plush room, we were served beers, whisky and snacks. Er Dong introduced his girlfriend to us then the line of girls arranged themselves in front of the plasma screen as he told us to pick our favourite. Those that didn’t choose were given a random girl. They were our hostesses: laughing at our jokes, singing, dancing, drinking and kissing, if you so wished. Bidding farewell to our girls, we were then taken to get some food along with the mamasan, and some other randoms that had occasionally popped in to join in with the frivolity, one of whom turned out to be a police man. Man bag man then drove us back to Ningbo. We are still speculating over his intentions with us…
Chris Berragan
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Impact Guide To… Making The Most Of Your Night Out
It happens to the best of us – a week’s worth of tiredness suddenly hits you like a wet towel in the middle of a promising night out. It’s only midnight but you’re flagging, and as bored as a paraplegic on an assault course. What to do? Obviously you can’t go home, having paid good money to get into your club of choice. Also, that would mean facing the wrath of your raving friends. This dilemma has plagued slightly sleepy students for years. What you need is VARIATION – usually found in the form of activities such as these…
1. See who out of your friends can claim the title of ‘cockiest bugger’ – this is best done through the use of ridiculous chat-up lines. Catch the eye of a passing girl and beckon her over, then lean forwards and whisper in her ear, “If I can make you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with all five!” This is best accompanied by a leer and a suggestive finger-wiggle.
2. It’s a sad fact that about 50% of clubbers cannot dance – usually, the half that have penises. If you need a sit down, keep yourself awake by watching the poor, awkward lumberings of the male contingent. However this could just plunge you into depression as you realise that, at 20, many of your fellow students are already ‘Dad-dancing.’
3. Easy Tiger has warned us all of the dangers of leaving your drink unattended. Help spread this message – those who don’t keep a close eye on their drink clearly do not love it enough, and so it’s your duty to (subtly) relieve them of it. This activity is slightly fraught with danger, especially at ISIS when the rugby lads are out in force, but the thrill makes it all the more exciting. Also, it keeps your wallet fat and your liver failing.
4. If you’re in Oceana, there’s a whole new range of fun to be had with a little preparation. The bouncers use laser pens to point out miscreants on the dancefloor – with little more than a grunt, their shaven-headed comrades charge over to remove the offenders. Now, if YOU were to be in possession of a laser pen…How many innocent revellers would they forcibly eject before they realised something was amiss?
5. Still not risky enough for you? Try that old family favourite, Buckaroo. Locate the fattest girl in the club. Leap. Hang on. See how long you can ride the whale.
Austin Tasseltine